


Ties That Bind

by maddsaa



Category: Death Stranding (Video Games)
Genre: F/M, Reader Insert, my first fanfic for death stranding, reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-06
Updated: 2020-01-14
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:29:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21692278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maddsaa/pseuds/maddsaa
Summary: After Y/N is rescued from her bike accident by Sam Bridges, she finds herself increasingly  connected to a man she only knows by reputation.---A/N: This is my first ever fanfic for Death Stranding. It's a reader-insert that follows the plot. The only canon divergence is probably the timing of certain events! Hopefully you enjoy!
Relationships: Sam Porter Bridges & You
Comments: 23
Kudos: 134





	1. Chapter 1

You awoke in a Bridges hospital room. Dazed and strangely numb, you tried to prop yourself up from the bed but someone gently pushed you back down against the pillows.

"Take it slow," said a familiar voice. It was Deadman. "The sedatives haven't worn off yet."

"What happened?" 

"You had a bike accident," Deadman said, "You were out for two days."

Bike accident. The words spurred your mind into action. You remembered a truck. The sound of people yelling. A sharp turn. Then darkness.

"-It's a miracle he found you when he did," Deadman said, bringing you back to the present moment. "Otherwise you would've been caught in the Timefall." 

You paused. "Who found me?"

Deadman shuffled in his chair next to your bed. "You don't remember? Sam brought you in."

Sam. Sam Porter Bridges. 

His name had quickly become commonplace around Capital Knot City. You'd only really known him by reputation. Now, he was the man who saved your life. 

The influx of information was too much for your mind to handle right now. It screamed for sleep, but you fought hard to stay awake.

Deadman, however, seemed to notice the struggle. "I will let you rest," he said, heading for the door. "There are nurses at your disposal if you need anything. I will come see you when I can," he said.

"Thank you," you said, grateful. 

Your eyelids grew heavy. Your body sank back into the mattress. Before you knew it, your world had gone back to black.

—

A few weeks later, you were allowed to return to your private room.

The nurses told you to expect full recovery so long as you took it easy for another couple of pains, until the pain and inflammation subsided for good.

Given how you'd only recently healed from broken fingers, had your stitches removed, and were still a little sore around the ribs, it wouldn't be hard to heed the nurses's advice. 

During the first couple of days, there wasn't much for you to do besides read, eat, sleep, and... well, read some more. You grew bored of the routine very quickly. 

Granted, at least boredom was better than having constant nightmares of your accident.

During your time in the hospital, they had plagued your thoughts and dreams. Every time you remembered the distinct sound of the MULE truck gaining on you, the screeching tires, losing control, you felt like you couldn't breath. Your hands would start to shake and your eyes would tear up.

You were doing much better now.

BRIDGES had you go through a lot of therapy -both physical and mental- to get you back on track. And thanks to that, the invasive thoughts and panic attacks eventually turned into nothing but a distant memory. 

You could even picture yourself going back out into the world and riding against the Timefall, although you had to admit: you'd never be as ready and willing to go through MULE territory ever again.

Thirsty, you reached for a drink. BRIDGES had given you water to go along with the energy drinks, but you didn't mind the boost. Who knew sitting around in a room all day could be so exhausting?

As you fuddled with the tab, a call ringed from your cufflink. 

It was Die-Hardman.

"Y/N," he said, "I'm on my way to your room. Just making sure you were ok with a visit."

"More than OK," you said, "Anything to distract me. Besides, I'm struggling with this stupid drink. Can't get it open." 

You heard a soft chuckle from the other side of the line. "Alright. We're nearly there."

"We?"

"Yes, I'm bringing someone. Hope you don't mind."

"Not at all," you said, curious more than anything.

After a few minutes later, the door to your private room opened, revealing Die-Hardman and a man standing behind him.

Your jaw nearly dropped.

It was Sam Bridges, out of uniform and hair completely damp, dripping water ever so often on his shoulders. He must've just stepped out of a shower.

When Sam's eyes met yours, your face grew inadvertently red. He was more handsome than you anticipated -in an offbeat kind of way. 

This made you nervous. You had practiced saying thank you to Sam so many times in your head, but now that he was really here, how were you supposed to do that without making it awkward? 

"Sorry to intrude," Die-Hardman said, forcing you out of your own head. "How are you feeling?"

"Much better than before. Although I'm sore here and there. And still can't open this can," you said, holding it out towards Die-Hardman. "A little help?" 

To your surprise, Sam reached out first and grabbed it off your hands. The can opened with a nice pop.

"Thanks," you said.

Sam grunted and gestured upwards with his chin in response.

"I'm sure there's a few things either of you want to say to each other, so I'll give you some privacy," Die-Hardman said.

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. "You're leaving? But you just got here."

"I'm actually not the reason for the visit. Sam is. He didn't know where to find your room, and since I had a few things to discuss with him, I figured I might as well kill two birds with one stone and bring him here."

Sam? Why would he want to come to you? You glanced at Sam, who was scanning the room nonchalantly.

Die-Hardman's cufflink blinked urgently. "Guess that's my cue to leave. Y/N, I'm glad to see you're doing well. If you need anything, you know you can access the cufflink." Then he paused, as if considering his next words. "There's no obligation for you to go back into the field, if you don't want to Y/N. I hope you know that. There'll be plenty for you to do here if you choose to stay."

You've been told this before by nurses -even Deadman- during your therapy, but you'd already made up your mind. "I don't think I can stay away from the outdoors too long. Trust me when I say I look forward to making deliveries again as soon as I'm able."

Despite the mask, you could tell Die-Hardman was smiling by the way his eyes crinkled. He said his last goodbye and left the room.

Now it was just you and Sam, who was studying your glass tank of cryptobiotes by the bed.

"You must really like these," Sam mumbled.

"I don't eat them," you said, "I keep them as pets. That's why there's so many."

Sam smirked. "Don't blame you. Rather keep them as pets myself. Hell, might start doing that too," he said.

You took a sip of your drink, feeling a little awkward. Sam watched the bugs.

After a while, he pulled out a chair and sat with a sigh. "I was gonna ask how you're feeling but Die-Hardman already beat me to it."

You thought he was being funny to break the ice, but his serious expression proved he genuinely meant what he said. His candidness made you smile.

"Are you serious about wanting going back out there?" he asked.

You took a seat at the edge of your bed. "Yeah. Wasn't a smooth decision, I have to admit. The first few weeks after the accident, even thinking of mountains made me freak out. But now, I find myself itching to go back. I'm sick of this place."

Sam nodded in agreement. "This place, maybe, but I'll never get sick of the showers. Especially when I'm all covered in fucking BT goo." His voice was bitter. 

"I take it you've had a bad run?" you said.

Sam scoffed. "Couple of bad runs. It's why I've been away for so long since I found you." His voice faltered. Sam massaged the back of his neck. "On that note, I guess you're probably wondering why I'm here."

"Yeah, kind of," you admitted. "But only because I thought I'd be the one to come to you first." 

"I've never 'delivered' a person before -especially not one who was on the brink of death. So -um, how do I put this? It didn't feel right to wash my hands of you just because I handed you over to some doctors. I just wanted to see for myself that you were OK," he said, averting your eyes.

His words came as a shock to you. At best, you assumed this'd been another inconsequential delivery for him. You would've never imagined you made such an impact. Deeply touched, you reached out to touch Sam but he recoiled before you got too close. A little confused, you drew your hand back.

"Thank you, Sam," you said, in earnest, "For taking the risk to bring me back to Capital Knot City and visiting me on top of that. You saved my life and I owe you so much." 

Sam shot you a brief look. "Nah, you don't owe me anything. You're alive, so that means we're square," he mumbled, pushing himself up off the chair and stretching out his arms. "Noticed you don't have a BB."

The sudden change of topics threw you off, but you went along with it anyways. Sam clearly wasn't the type to dwell on emotional subjects. "Don't need one," you said.

There was a curious look in Sam's eye. "You can see BTs?"

"Yeah. I'm not at Fragile's level where I can jump to other places, but being able to spot still comes in handy. I think that makes me a level three. Or four? God I can never remember the system." 

Sam opened his mouth to say something, but a call rang from his cufflink.

It was Die-Hardman requesting his presence in the Distribution Center. There were new orders to be delivered.

"No rest for the wicked, huh," Sam mumbled. "Well, it was nice to finally meet you, Y/N. Maybe I'll see you around?"

The cufflink rang again.

Sam groaned. "Take it easy, Y/N," he said before he left.

"You too," you replied, happy with the outcome of the day, and the prospects of maybe seeing Sam again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: just wanted to disclaim that some dialogue was taken from the game but modified slightly to better suit this plot!

A month had passed.

By now you'd made enough deliveries to regain all confidence in yourself as a porter. But thanks to Die-Hardman managing your work, you'd only ever run to nearby Preppers.

Until today.

As you loaded medicinal equipment onto your bike, Die-Hardman's hologram appeared at the terminal.

"Y/N, I see you've accepted the delivery," he said.

"Yep," you said, raising an eyebrow. "Is there an issue?"

"None at all. Just making sure you're ready, considering how you're travelling a long distance carrying delicate cargo."

"Don't worry. I promise won't fuck this up," you said, unable to mask your frustration at his lack of confidence in you.

He'd been understandably hesitant to send you anywhere outside of the chiral network too soon, but there was only so much babysitting you could tolerate.

Die-Hardman gave you a nod. His hologram flickered and disappeared.

You smoothed your hair back into a pony-tail and browsed through the terminal one last time. Your destination was Port Knot City, which meant this would be your longest run to date. You had a lot to prove -both to yourself and BRIDGES. You wanted to be well-prepared. Bola gun? Check. Anti-BT weaponry? Check. Extra blood bags? Yep.

It was nerve-wrecking, exciting, and all in thanks to Sam for putting it back on the chiral network just a few days ago.

You bit your bottom lip. You hadn't thought much of Sam. Then again, on account of your return to making deliveries, you admittedly hadn't thought much of anything.

You instantly wondered how and where he was. Every time you sat with other porters at the cafeteria, they always seemed to have news of his latest travels, of which obscure Prepper had joined the UCA.

He moved so fast, you couldn't help but muse that by the time you reached Port Knot city yourself, he'd already have rebuilt America entirely.

You smirked and mounted the bike.

Revving the engine twice, you drove off to your new destination.

—

The brief that came with the orders had told you not to worry about taking Timefall shelters or container repairs because Port Knot City never got the rain.

The upside-down rainbow in the sky proved otherwise.

You muttered a curse under your breath. So much for trying to be prepared. You sped up and ignored the spike of anxiety at the pit of your stomach. Getting the cargo delivered unharmed was the priority, your nerves be damned. The destination wasn't far, you could even see the Distribution Centre coming up ahead.

The sound of thundering clouds motivated you to speed up some more.

Stupid rain, you thought. Of all days you could choose to come pouring down.

As your bike crossed into the city you noticed hundreds of dead sea creatures scattered throughout the pavement.

This could only mean BTs. But this close to the City?

It didn't make any sense.

To make matters worse, the power grid suddenly shut down.

Heart racing, you navigated your way closer to the Distribution Center, noticing a vague outline of another porter at the entrance. A breath of relief escaped your lips.

"Hey," you called out.

The porter saw you and waved back.

When you finally reached the center, the porter had his back to you, observing the Timefall.

"What the hell's going on," you asked, checking your cargo. The Timefall hadn't damaged it too much. You'd still get some good reviews.

"Beats me," he said. "This shit ain't supposed to happen here."

You froze at the sound of the voice.

"Sam?"

The porter turned slowly and his eyes grew wide.

"Y/N," he said. "What are you doing here?"

"Delivering, finally." The answer was short. As much as you would've loved to have a proper reunion, this clearly wasn't the time for a chat. "What do we do?" you asked.

"Dunno." 

Sam's BB started to whimper. His Odradek shot right out, blinking in search for BTs.

"See anything?" Sam asked.

"No," you said, apprehensive.

He stepped out into the rain and for some reason, you went after him.

"This is so strange," you said, "Why is-"

You felt something wet pool around your ankles. You looked down. There was black liquid all around you.

Shit.

Before you could move away, BTs shot out of the water and dragged you down with them.

You tried to push them off, but there were too many, their grip unrelenting, pushing you neck deep into the water. It got in your eyes. You couldn't see. You couldn't breathe.

The BTs dragged you off through the water. You tried to scream and kick but it was no use-

You reached for a hematic grenade when they released their hold on you.

With your heart racing rapidly, threatening to burst, you sat upright. The BTs pawed at you lightly. 

"Y/N."

It was Sam. He'd been dragged out here too, but was already up on his feet, focused on something in the distance. He stood stock still, as if unaware of his own BTs holding him in place.

"Get up," he said.

Perplexed, you followed his line of sight.

There was a masked man approaching, but he was seemingly in no rush to reach you and Sam.

Despite this, you quickly scrambled up to your feet and waited with baited breath. The BTs moaned and grabbed at your clothes, threatening to throw you off balance. 

You prepared a grenade but it was ripped out of your grasp and straight onto the man's hand. With a snap of his fingers, the grenade was gone.

He raised his arms and hoisted himself out of the water into midair, ripping pieces of the concrete along with him as if they weighed nothing.

"The name's Higgs," he said, "The particle of God that permeates all existence." He paused. Something caught his attention in the distance. "Ah, so it was you that dragged you into this?"

You turned only to see Fragile at the roof of the Distribution Center.

"Bloodied but unbowed," Higgs said, before somehow knocking Fragile's umbrella right out of her hand.

She disappeared within a split second.

When you spun back around, Higgs had reappeared behind Sam. He leaned in to smell him, much to your horror.

Sam tried to back away but the BTs at his feet forced him in place.

"What's this? Bridget Strand is dead?" Higgs said, "America's last president. Dead and burned." He leaned in for another sniff.

Something snapped in you.

"Leave him alone, asshole!" You yelled, reaching for your bola gun.

Higgs disappeared and reappeared directly in front of you. "Well, well, aren't you oh so brave, in spite of your accident. Tell me, how much did it hurt-" he grabbed a hold of your hand and pulled it away from the gun, "-when you broke your fingers?" He singled out your index finger and pushed it backwards slowly. 

The alarm bells in your mind went off. Your nerves were on fire.

"No! Don't!" You cried, terrified.

To your relief, Higgs stopped, leaving you gasping for breath and shaken. 

He jumped back a few feet away from you.

"You're cute, but you won't last long out here. And you," Higgs said, pointing to Sam, "Your sister won't last long either. But don't worry. I'll keep her safe. In fact-"

Higgs jumped close to Sam and whispered something in his ear.

You watched as the blood drained from Sam's face.

Satisfied with himself, Higgs took a few steps back and dove his hands into the water. With a grunt he pulled out thick black strands that were clearly attached to something.

Something big.

Without warning an enormous BT broke out of the surface of the water. It was quite a distance away but you could make out a head covered in obscenely thick, slithering tentacles. When it roared, the ground shook.

"I'd watch out if I were you," Higgs laughed, "Don't wanna be causing another voidout, do we? Unless you're keen for a game over."

He raised his hand and disappeared, this time for good.

Instantly, the BTs let go and sank back into the depths of the murky water while the monster clawed its way forward through the city.

"We need to get to higher ground," you panicked, looking around frantically.

"This way!" Sam gestured for you to follow him to a half-submerged bus next a building. One look and you realised it would serve as footing to climb onto the rooftop. 

You staggered through the water. The levels had quickly risen up to your waist. Still, you somehow managed to reach and push yourself onto the bus. Sam swiftly made the climb onto the rooftop, but you discovered you were too short to grab a hold of the edge. 

Sam would have to help you up.

Sam figured this out too, but hesitated.

"Come on!" You yelled desperately. The creature was drawing near.

Sam muttered something under his breath then reached out a hand. You took it and with a pull, you were on the rooftop. 

You stood back to back with Sam, breathing heavily, grenades at the ready.

The BT slithered closer, like a monster in a nightmare.

You threw the grenade hard and it hit the monster right between the eyes, but it wasn't enough to deter him. He started to scale the building like it was nothing.

Sam threw a grenade, and then another. This time, the BT lost its grip of the building and dropped back into the water.

For a while, the city fell into an eerie silence. All you could hear was BB's cries of fear. Sam gently touched the pod to soothe it.

"Do you think it's gone?" You asked, arming yourself with two grenades like Sam.

Sam shook his head, unsure. He walked over to the edge of the building and took a peak over the side of the building. 

A few seconds later, Sam turned shrugged helplessly.

He took a step towards you and suddenly, the BT resurfaced with all its might, reaching for Sam.

Your instincts kicked in. You threw your grenades at the monster with all your strength, hitting it both times.

The BT shrieked something awful while Sam scrambled back to you. It twisted and turned, writhing in pain as it turned a golden colour. 

With one last cry the creature hardened into pure chiral matter then broke into a thousand pieces that floated gently up to the sky.

The rain finally stopped and the sky began to clear.

Within seconds, the dark waters dried up and Port Knot City returned to normal.

Your legs almost buckled from underneath you but you caught yourself in the last moment, resting your hands on your knees. 

"Jesus, I can't believe I just survived that," you muttered.

There was no response.

You glanced at Sam. He stared at the ground, troubled by something. You noticed even his BB seemed concerned.

"Sam? You good?"

Sam snapped out of his daze. "Hm? Yeah." He made his way towards you. There was a grave look in his eyes. "Look, Higgs said something about the President."

"Yeah, that she was dead. He was fucking with you, right?" You smirked, but Sam's expression didn't change. Your heart sank. "Don't tell me-"

"Nobody can know," Sam stated harshly, "If word gets out, you can kiss your UCA goodbye."

The anger made you back away. "I won't speak of this to anyone. I swear," you said. 

His expression softened, but only slightly. "Good, let's get the hell out of here."

The way back to the Distribution Centre was quiet and uneventful. Despite what you'd both had gone through, it felt like Sam had nothing else to say to you. If you weren't so exhausted, you might've felt disappointed.

You parted ways with Sam at the terminal. You had to finalise your deliveries, and Sam needed to take a "god damn nap."

After that, you made your way to your designated private room.

As expected, it was emptier than the room you had back at Capital Knot City, but it still made you feel miserable.

At the very least there were two cryptobiotes in the room to keep you company. You named them Crypto and Biote.

You sat on the bed, and your eyelids felt heavy. Hell, maybe you needed a "god damn nap", too.

You dropped back against the pillows and with a heavy sigh, let your mind drift off into a dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments/questions/critiques are always welcome. I do this purely as a hobby, so won't be butthurt if you tell me something's weird (unless you're intentionally mean. Then I will become very butthurt). I just seek to provide some entertainment!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Comments, critiques, and/or questions are always welcome. And thank you for all the support so far!

It was true, Port Knot City really didn't get the rains, at least not when separatist creeps like Higgs were around. Thanks to that -and the peaceful view of the lake- it was easy to forget that the Death Stranding had ever happened. 

The minute you stepped foot outside of the walls, however, the illusion was instantly shattered. Everywhere you looked there were MULE camps, BTs, the damaging Timefall...

Still, you tried your best not to get too depressed about the fact that reality had become so severe, there was no time to relax anymore. 

In fact, whenever you could, you always tried to sneak in some fun or downtime, especially when you were out on a run. Although this really only meant a quick pause to appreciate the view or enjoy the silence, it made a difference. It helped you cope.

During one of these efforts, instead of taking the same path from the Musician to Port Knot City, you chose to explore a new path in hopes you'd come across some other breathtaking view, or find yourself a nice place to sit and have a drink. 

As you trudged past the rocky hillside, you suddenly noticed smoke emerging from the distance.

You'd never seen smoke like this before. Why was it there? You figured it couldn't be caused by a MULE. They'd never be so careless as to give away their position with a fire. Besides, you hadn't noticed any of their sensors coming down this new route. This meant they were not around. 

The most logical explanation was that it might be another Porter. Curious, you crossed through the uneven terrain, careful not to bring any harm to the cargo on your back. 

The closer you came to the source of smoke, however, the more curiosity gave way to confusion. 

The smoke was too clear to come from a fire. In fact, it didn't take long to realise that it wasn't smoke at all. 

It was steam -steam coming from a natural hot spring.

You smiled wide. You'd often heard Porters chatting excitedly about a hot spring's healing properties, warmth, and how some even helped your digestion, of all things. The Porters also mentioned that not everyone found one. You were lucky.

You looked up at the clear sky -no sign of Timefall any time soon. You felt a rush of excitement. It would be a wasted opportunity not to take a dip.

You removed your gloves to test the waters. It was hot, obviously, but not scalding.

When stepped into the warm water, you sighed with a sense of satisfaction you'd never felt before. The feeling of the hot spring soothing your rope burns, cuts, and bruises was as close to heaven as you could get.

Ever since then, you'd made a point to sneak back whenever you could.

Today was no exception.

A run to the Wind Farm had proven to be particularly stressful. Not only did you run into BTs, they nearly ruined your cargo, and left you covered in their gross black residue -which you miserably discovered stank the longer you waited to wash it off.

To say you raced to the hot spring was an understatement. When the familiar steam of the water finally came into view a couple of hours later, you almost burst into tears of relief.

It only took seconds to pile your belongings in a corner and plunge straight into the water. You wanted to get the BT stuff off as soon as possible, worried the smell would stick to you.

You scrubbed at your face and skin, clearing away all the grime from your body, and leaving you pink, shiny -and most importantly, happy.

Now you could relax.

With a long exhale, you sat, legs crossed and closed your eyes-

You heard footsteps, a stagger, and a sharp gasp.

You turned in a panic, just in time to catch Sam, face red, frozen mid-motion with his body half-turned from you.

A long second passed.

Finally, embarrassment kicked in you ducked chin-deep into the water.

"Excuse me," he said, flustered. "I didn't realise- I wasn't-"

"Turn around!" you screeched.

Somehow his face grew a full shade darker. He easily obliged.

"Sorry," he mumbled awkwardly.

"I's fine," you muttered, although it wasn't fine. Sam had ruined the one thing you'd spent all day looking forward to. The only reason you didn't wring his neck was because that would cause a void out. Then you'd lose your life and the hot spring.

Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed clouds gather in the sky. This could only mean one thing. Your heart sank.

"I'll just er- go," Sam said, bringing your attention back to him.

"No wait," you blurted out, "I'm just about to leave. Timefall's gonna be here any minute now." With a deep breath, you stood and got dressed. All the while, Sam did not dare turn around.

"Um, where you headed?" He asked, clearing his throat.

"Back to Port Knot City," you replied, quickly zipping up your suit. "You?"

"I'm off to the Distribution Centre West of Capital Knot City."

"All the way there, huh?"

"Someone's gotta do it," Sam said. There was something off about the way he spoke, but you were annoyed with him, so you didn't ask.

Your Odradek signalled Timefall was on its way and automatically prepared your hood.

You rushed to attach all the remaining equipment to your suit, then took one last look at the hot spring.

You left as the rain began.

The Timefall made the trek down the rocky hills incredibly slippery. You'd try to find even terrain to create a safer route to the valley, but even with the surest of footings, sometimes you still managed to lose your grip.

"Stupid rain," you mumbled, frustrated, "Stupid porter. Stupid Death Stranding."

"You good?" Sam asked, catching his breath. He was carrying so much cargo, you felt bad for holding a grudge. After all, it'd been an accidental.

"Yeah, I'm good. Hey, do you need any help with your packages?"

Sam shook his head adamantly. "No, I've got this."

"You sure?"

Sam walked straight ahead. "Yes I'm su-"

A stone shifted from under his foot and launched his whole weight to the right. He fought hard for balance, holding onto the cargo for dear life, but ultimately lost the fight.

He fell flat on his face.

You rushed to him as he pushed himself up on his knees. There was a small gash on his cheek. You wanted to reach out and touch it, but a single look of warning from Sam prompted you to keep your hands to yourself.

His BB was shrieking.

With a grunt of effort, Sam stood back up on his feet. He removed the pod from his suit and rocked it, but it didn't take long to realise BB would not stop crying.

"Is BB OK?" you asked, worried.

"Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to calm down. Come on, BB... Come on..." Sam looked exhausted.

For some reason, your hands shot up. "May I try?"

Sam stared at you. You couldn't read his expression, but given how he'd refused your help before, you figured he'd deny you again. You watched as his eyes darted down to BB and back to you.

About to give up, Sam placed the pod in your hands.

"Be careful," he said.

You were shocked at Sam's unexpected decision, but it only took a split second for you to pull yourself together.

You gently rocked BB the same way you'd seen him do, humming whatever simple tunes came to mind. Then, slowly but surely, BB's cries died down until it cooed happily instead. BB even tapped the glass and babbled nonsense at you.

You and Sam briefly exchanged looks. You returned the pod to him.

"Er, thanks," Sam said in disbelief. "That was... Did you ever do that before?"

"Soothe a baby, you mean? No, normally I seem to make them cry harder," you said honestly.

Sam smirked.

After a while, you and Sam reached the final point of your journey together. By this stage the Timefall had let up and the sky had cleared again.

"Finally," Sam muttered to nobody in particular as he closed his eyes to soak up some sun rays.

You watched him, amused. Seemed like he enjoyed the small luxuries, too.

"This is where we part ways," he said.

"Guess so. But I'll probably see you later, I mean, we keep running into each other."

Sam looked reluctant. "Maybe. I got ordered to bring Lake Knot City back into the grid. After that, Die-Hardman will most likely send me off further East. I have to find Amelie."

"Oh," you said, trying your best to mask your disappointment. "Well, let me know how things are on that side of the lake."

Sam smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "You take care of yourself Y/N," he said and headed off into the west.


	4. Chapter 4

_My mission is to retrieve the stolen documents from the postbox._

_You repeated the words silently, over and over again, as the MULE camp came into view beyond the hills. Their sensors were nearby, but you weren't worried about getting tracked. You made sure not to bring any cargo they could possibly tag._

_They would have no idea you were coming._

_You eased up on speed until your bike finally came to a halt. This next part would be easier on foot._

_You scanned your surroundings, unable to see any MULE near you -only the three hanging around the campsite. The postbox stood right outside the main tent. With enough stealth, you'd be able to slip right past them._

_Your hands were shaking, breathing uneasy. You got this, you thought, though the words of encouragement did little to soothe the nerves._

_Still, with one last shaky breath, you entered their base._

_You kept your body low and sneaked into patches of tall grass whenever you could. Your stomach lurched, threatening to make you sick, but you refused to let the nerves get the best of you. Besides, you'd made good progress in a short amount of time. The postbox was only a few meters away, now. There was no turning back._

_As you waited to move into the next patch of grass, a MULE strolled past, whistling. You'd been so focused on the mission, you never saw him coming._

_You held your breath and covered your mouth, crouching down as low as possible. He stopped a short distance from you and looked in your general direction. You felt you could be sick all over again when he called over another MULE._

_Had you been spotted?_

_Hands shaking, you gripped your bola gun, preparing for potential confrontation. The other MULE walked straight by you and chatted with the other._

_You waited anxiously, muscles on fire from holding them in the same position for so long. You strained to listen as their conversation grew more and more excited. You picked out words such as "break" and "drink", and soon, they turned and walked into a tent, leaving you alone in the field._

_You couldn't celebrate just yet. Despite the false alarm, there was still the third MULE to account for._

_From your hiding spot, you searched for him, but he was nowhere in sight._

_You sat back on your heels, and considered your options: you could either wait or make a run for it._

_You surveyed the area one last time. The third MULE had finally come into view: he was far away and had his back turned towards you._

_Perfect._

_Without a moment's hesitation, you broke into a run straight for the postbox._

_The locker opened easily and you quickly retrieved the stolen documents, hands shaking so bad you nearly dropped them. You cursed under your breath and attached them to the suit. For a split second you considered grabbing the rest of the stolen cargo when someone yelled behind you._

_You'd been caught red-handed._

_Shit. Shit. Shit._

_You took off as fast as you could, documents under your arms, and made for your bike._

_Sharp electric poles flew by your face, but you dodged them all. Adrenaline pumped through your veins, pushing you faster and further away from the MULES._

_When you noticed your bike in the distance, you somehow doubled your speed, your lungs and legs on the edge of bursting._

_You climbed onto the bike and sped away, heart pounding._

_One look behind you and you saw the MULES were on a truck, fast approaching._

_You swerved left, closer to the rocks. Maybe you'd be able to lose them there._

_They were yelling obscenities. One of them threw a pole but missed._

_You couldn't help but smirk. You were getting away-_

_Another pole came crashing down close to your front wheel. You turned a sharp right to dodge the electrical charge, but hit a rock and lost control of the vehicle._

_You hit another rock and next thing you knew, you were flying midair-_

You awoke with a loud gasp, body slick with sweat.

You couldn't breath.

Scrambling desperately to get off your bed, you nearly tripped over the bedsheets as you made for the sink.

The mirror lights turned on automatically, reflecting your distraught image. The water was cold over your face, and your stomach churned. You were going to be sick.

Focus on the present, you heard Deadman's voice say in the back of your head. It was the simple -but helpful- advice he gave you during your weeks of therapy.

Focus on the present.

You took a couple of deep breaths. Ok, where were you? In your private room in Port Knot City. The room was plain. Most of your belongings were back at Capital Knot City. You had two cryptobiote pets called Crypto and Biote. 

You smiled in spite of yourself. They were such stupid names.

The panic attack was slowly loosening its grip on your body. Your shoulders relaxed, jaws unclenched. You dragged yourself back to bed, nausea still lingering. Focus on the present. You had white sheets and grey duvet. There were wet spots on your pillows. You had cried.

You lied flat on your back, breathing away the last remnants of your panic. It'd been months since you last had an episode this bad. You'd almost forgotten how debilitated they made you feel. And you detested feeling debilitated.

It wasn't long before you sat up again, determined to do something to distract your mind. You decided to go on a walk.

Grabbing a light sweater, you exited your room and made for the outdoors. The view of the lake was bound to help you feel better.

You left the Distribution Center to find the night warm and the breeze pleasantly cool. You caught a whiff of the lake and wondered, at the back of your mind, if it would ever be safe to go swimming someday.

Following down the path to the harbour, you took a seat by the concrete steps of the loading zone and watched the reflection of the moon gently ebb and flow on the water's surface.

Last time you were here, Sam and Fragile had embarked on their journey to Lake Knot City. That day, you had recently returned from a delivery and managed to catch them right as they disappeared into the boat. You hadn't heard from them since.

"Hey," came a voice from behind you.

You spun around to see a Porter behind you. You couldn't make out his face from the shadow cast by his cap, but it didn't matter. It paid to be friendly to fellow Porters out here. All you had was each other anyways.

"Hi," you replied, "Couldn't sleep either?"

"Not really."

You turned back towards the lake. "Well, when that happens, I like to come sit out here. The water calms me down."

"Shame it wont last. We're on a countdown to the end of the world."

"What do you mean?" you asked, turning back towards him, but the man only smiled and shook his head cryptically. You decided not to push the subject.

Instead, you rose up to your feet, dusted yourself off, and offered your hand. "Um, I'm Y/N. You?"

The porter took your hand. "I think you already know," he said, discarding his cap to reveal his face.

Your eyes went wide and you staggered backwards. 

It was Higgs.

"Hello again, sweetheart," he said, "Nice to see you're still around."

Your mind was screaming for you to get away, but you were too afraid and confused to make a move.

"W-what are you doing here?" you asked.

"Just on my way back from seeing Sam," Higgs stated simply.

Your blood turned to ice. "What did you do to him?"

"Why? Are you worried I hurt him?" Higgs chuckled. "Aw, don't make that face. He's fine. I only helped him make a delivery." He disappeared and reappeared behind you.

You spun around, not letting him out of your sight.

Higgs looked pensive. "You know what's funny? When I told him I was coming to Port Knot City, he looked so distressed -just like you. I assumed he was worrying about Fragile, but now I can see I was wrong."

You gritted your teeth, trying to keep the trembling under control. "How so?"

"Because I hadn't considered someone like you would turn out to be this interesting to him." He took a step closer, his gaze fixated on you, like a prey set on their next meal. "I'm able to foresee a lot of events, but this one, I must admit I never saw it coming-"

A machine made a loud noise in the distance, momentarily drawing Higgs' attention away from you.

Without hesitation, you turned and bolted as fast as you could.

You only made it as far as the edge of the city before Higgs appeared in front of you. He grabbed you and next thing you knew, you were shoved hard against a wall. He placed his hands on either side of you, one leg between yours, to pin you in place.

"Get off me!" You screamed.

Higgs covered your mouth with his hand. "No. Don't be noisy," he said, shaking his head. "Or I'm going to turn this place into a crater. Do you understand?"

You nodded and he slowly pulled his hand away.

"Why are you doing this?" you said.

Higgs smirked. "You see, my employer needs Sam to hurry up and finish bringing the UCA back together. Things were going to plan until you showed up, that is."

You gulped. "I- I don't understand. I thought you were all separatists. Why are you so invested in the restoration of the UCA? And what does any of that have to do with me?"

"Let me spell it out for you: you're a _distraction_ , sweetheart, which makes you a problem. And in order to solve this problem, I need to get you out of the picture." He tilted your chin upwards. "Maybe I should bring you over to my men. I bet they would love the company." He leaned in and licked your jawline. 

You winced, disgusted. 

"No," he mused, "I think a warning is enough: be a good girl and back off. If I catch you with Sam, you're BT food."

"Fuck you. I'm not afraid of your threats," you spat.

Higgs grabbed your neck. "You should be." He squeezed hard. 

All of a sudden, shouts sounded from the Distribution Centre. It was Porters. 

"Guess I ran out of time," Higgs said, suddenly letting you go. 

You collapsed on the floor, coughing and gasping for air. 

Higgs was nowhere in sight.

You remained frozen on the floor. The shouts of the Porters drew near, but you were oblivious to them. Your mind was reeling with too many questions you didn't have the answers to.

It took a Porter helping you back on your feet before you snapped out of your daze.

"What happened? Are you alright?" they asked you.

All you could do was shake your head.

"Come on," one of the Porters said, gently holding your arm. "Let's get you inside. The nurses can-"

"No," you said, suddenly finding your voice again. It sounded rough. "No, I'm ok. I just need to go to my room."

The Porter's eyes went wide. "Are you sure? We should at least notify Die-Hardman."

"No. Don't tell him. I don't want him to be worried. He has more important things to deal with. Please," you begged. 

Bewildered with your response, but unwilling to go against your wishes, the Porters insisted they at least escort you back to your room. You didn't have the heart to deny them. After all, they just wanted to be helpful.

They left you by the door. 

You walked inside but didn't turn the lights on.

You sat down in your bed and felt _nothing_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Loved writing this chapter! I didn't expect it to take such a gritty turn, but I'm very excited to work with this new angle. Besides, you can't have good moments without the bad, so bring on more conflict! haha
> 
> Also, I worked on this when I was about to go to bed, so if there are any grammatical errors or careless mistakes, do feel free to point them out!


	5. Chapter 5

The cafeteria wasn’t as crowded as usual today. From your seat in the corner table, you observed as Porters and other BRIDGES staff members walked in and out the doors, going about their busy day.

Even though everyone looked familiar, you couldn’t ignore the paranoia creeping up your spine and infesting your head with worry. They could be Higgs’ people.

_If I catch you with Sam, you’re BT food._

Although Higgs never specified how he’d keep an eye on you, it wasn’t difficult to entertain the possibility he’d implanted spies everywhere. Given how easily he waltzed into BRIDGES, who’s to say he hadn't facilitated this for others?

You clenched your jaw and played with the scraps of food on your plate. They could be onto you right now, waiting for you to slip up so they could notify Higgs.

No longer hungry, you piled all of your trash onto your plate and left the table. You considered whether a trip to the hot springs would help you relax when someone caught your attention.

You nearly dropped your food.

Sam had entered the cafeteria.

You swallowed dry and stared at the ceiling, pleading to the universe: Jesus, of all people, why _him_? And why here where everyone could see? Wasn’t he supposed to be somewhere on the other side of the country by now?

Sam hadn’t noticed you yet, but you were determined to make sure it stayed that way.

You hurried to throw away your leftovers, so focused on Sam that you never noticed a Porter stand up suddenly. He knocked your plate straight out of your hands and the metal clanged loudly as it hit the floor. 

The room fell dead silent. Blood rushing to your face, you could feel the weight of everyone’s gaze as you bent down quickly to clean up the mess.

The Porter apologised profusely but you waved him off. You had to get out of here-

Too late.

A pair of boots appeared in front of you. You didn’t have to look up to know who it was.

“Y/N,” Sam said. You hear a sharp intake of breath. “What happened to your neck?”

“It’s nothing,” you muttered, trying to keep your voice steady as you righted yourself and rushed past him. “Sorry, I’m really busy. Talk to you later,” you lied.

You left the cafeteria without so much as glancing back at Sam. You didn’t have the courage to be near him, nor did you have the heart to see him look disappointed.

You raced to take on a new order. Anything to get you away from Port Knot City for the day.

Hopefully he’d be gone by the time you came back.

He wasn't.

He was still in Port Knot City the next day.

And many days after that.

You ran into Sam at the cafeteria, the hallway, the Distribution Centre, and even out on your trails during runs. And every time he tried to start a conversation, you would cut it short and make an excuse to leave.

Today, Sam was by the terminal. You’d returned home from a delivery to find him listening to some tips from Mama’s hologram. Lucky for you, he seemed engrossed in information about handguns, so you snuck past, intent on making it to your private room without him realising you were ever there.

You were almost at the platform when Sam called out your name. You pretended you didn’t hear him, fully aware that it made you look stupid. The Distribution Centre had frustratingly good acoustics. Even Die-Hardman in his office all the way at HQ would’ve heard Sam.

You noticed the frustration and confusion build up in Sam's voice as he called you again, but you made it to the elevator without ever acknowledging him. It was potentially one of the hardest things you'd ever done.

As the elevator began its descent, you couldn’t help but take one look at Sam.

You’d never seen him so upset.

Something snapped in you. 

By the time the elevators reached the lower levels of the Distribution Center, your blood was boiling.

You were angry, so angry -at yourself for being such a coward and at Higgs for putting you in this position.

You wanted to punch something, break something, destroy anything you could get your hands on.

You kicked and overturned chairs, threw the pillows off your bed, pushed all of your books and empty Monster cans off the table.

You reached for Crypto and Biote’s jar but you stopped short.

They floated around so innocently and oblivious to your actions.

Their wet, slimy coat shined in the light, like someone had licked them.

All of a sudden you felt the distinct sensation of Higgs' tongue tracing your jawline. 

Anger turned into crippling disgust.

You raced for the shower.

When the hot water ran over your body, you tried to picture it cleaning all of the marks Higgs had left on you. You waited for a sensation of relief, but it never came. No matter how hard you tried, you could still feel him.

Defeated, you slid down the shower walls and didn't hold back the tears when they came. You couldn’t take it anymore. Higgs, Sam, even the end of the fucking world. You sobbed into your hands, exhausted, until all the tears were gone. 

You lost track of time of how long you sat in place, staring at the water droplets bounce against the white floors.

Eventually, the shower automatically turned itself off, forcing you to get up so it could begin the drying process.

You slowly dressed yourself, and, without thinking, threw the pillows back on the bed. Going through the motions helped you believe you had any sort of control over your life at all. It made you feel a little more motivated. You uprighted all the chairs, picked up your books from the floor, and threw the cans in the trash. 

There was a knock at your door.

“Come in,” you said.

The door opened and Sam walked in hesitantly.

You eyes widened, gripped with fear at the sight of him. Your mind ran wild with a million thoughts, but you were too stunned to make sense of them. You only knew one thing: he couldn't be here. “Y-you have to get out.” You pointed to the door. “Get out! Please.”

Frustratingly, Sam stood his ground. “Was it something I said?” he pleaded.

The question threw you off. “What?”

“You keep avoiding me, you look at me like I disgust you. Did I insult you?”

You opened your mouth, then shut it. Fear was giving rise to panic. Your chin started to quiver. Higgs was going to catch you. “Sam, I can’t-“

"Can't what?" he muttered angrily. "What the hell is going on, Y/N? I came all the way to Port Knot because I wanted to check on you after Higgs-" he froze, eyes widening in realisation. “No. Son of a bitch,” he uttered in shock. “He was here, wasn't he?" 

Your silence was confirmation enough. 

Your hands touched your neck, “No, he just… He just threatened me. He said he was going to kill me if we were seen together. So please, you have to go." 

Sam gasped. “What?”

Fresh tears pricked your eyes, but you fought hard not to let Sam see you cry. “He thinks I’m going to keep you from completing the UCA.”

"This doesn’t make any sense. I thought he was trying to fuck up the world.”

“I know,” you sighed, exasperated, “But either way, I’m freaking out that he’ll see us. I don’t want to turn this place into a fucking crater.”

Sam’s expression softened, “He’s not going to find us here, Y/N.”

“How would you know? He made infiltrating this building look like child’s play!”

"Maybe he got in the first time because he used to be a Porter and had the access codes. But Die-Hardman would notice if he did it again, alright? Security measures have doubled. We’re all safe here. I promise. It won't be so easy for Higgs to set foot on BRIDGES property, let alone a private room."

You smoothed your hair back. You wanted to trust Sam, you really did, but it was so hard. “I’m scared, Sam," you said.

The room fell silent.

“I’m scared too, Y/N.”

His confession took you by surprise. He took the liberties of sitting on your bed and you didn’t stop him.

“Everyone’s been calling me a hero lately, but I don’t deserve that title. Heroes are supposed to protect people and I can’t even protect my sister or BB-"

“Hold on, did something happen to BB?”

Sam shook his head. “Forget it. You wouldn’t believe it.”

“Try me."

Sam considered his words for a moment. "I got caught in a chiral storm -a really bad one. And I don’t know how, but it transported me to this battlefield in World War I… And before you call bullshit, listen to this.” Sam held up his cufflink and played an audio recording from a few days ago.

The distinct sounds of gunshots, planes flying overhead, bombs exploding echoed through the room. It was unlike anything you’ve ever heard before.

“That's insane,” you murmured, incredulous.

“Yeah, but it’s not the only thing. There was a soldier out there who kept going after my BB. The guy almost managed, but then, all of a sudden, I was taken back in our time.”

You frowned. “Why would he want your BB?”

Sam shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know. It kinda seemed like he knew it, but I’ll have to ask Deadman to look into it.” He took in a breath. "Either way, it’s all fucked up. Amelie is a hostage, I almost lost BB, and apparently, Higgs has invested interest in the UCA. I don’t know what the hell I’m supposed to do, Y/N.”

Forgetting all about your fear, you wish you could hug Sam at this moment, but you knew it wouldn’t be appropriate. Instead, you took a seat next to him.

“You know you have to keep BB safe and you have to save Amelie, no matter what. So keep doing that."

“But what about you?”

“Sam, just forget me.”

“No way. Look, Higgs can do what he wants to the UCA. But I’m not going to let him have my sister or ruin this.”

Your face grew warm. “Then what do we do?”

“We'll have to avoid each other out there and keep doing our jobs. But we can still see each other in private rooms. Deal?”

A small part of you felt doubtful whether this could work, but the larger part of you was more than willing to try -if only to spite Higgs. “Deal.” A smile tugged at your lips. It'd been the first one in days.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hey guys! Sabrina here. Wanted to thank you all for keeping up with TTB, for your kudos, and your comments. You make me so excited to write! I also wanted to wish everyone happy holidays. Hope the comings days are gentle with you xx

"So let me get this straight," you said, can of beer in one hand. "You're telling me Mama's technically dead, but her soul lives on thanks to her connection with Lockne?"

"Yeah, it's really crazy," Sam mumbled, sat across from you at the table. He pointed at the pack of beer close to you and you slid a can towards him.

"Sounds like you had one hell of a week," you said, taking a sip of your drink. "Oh man, I haven't had this in ages. Gotta pace myself, though, or I might get drunk," you smiled.

Sam didn't return the smile. Instead, he stared into his drink.

"What's with the brooding?" you teased.

Sam tapped his fingers. "I wasn't going to mention this, but I don't think it's fair to keep it from you."

Your interest peaked. You leaned forward. "Keep what?"

"I saw Higgs." 

You almost spat beer all over yourself. "Wha- I- Are you serious?" you stammered, "Does he... Does he know?"

Sam shook his head. "He has no clue, Y/N."

You scoffed, incredulous. "How can you be so sure?"

"Look, I might not know Higgs well enough, but I do know that if he caught onto us, he'd be rubbing it all over my face, alright? Dude gets off on having the upper hand."

The room started to spin. You couldn't tell if it was because of the nerves or the alcohol. You took a deep breath.

"Y/N," Sam said, voice filled with concern.

You held up a hand. "I'm ok. I'm just taking it all in." You finished your drink in one big gulp and crushed the can with your hands. "Are we safe from Higgs?"

"Yeah. We're safe," Sam said with a reaffirming nod.

"Then how come you still look so worried?" 

"That's because I have a favour to ask of you."

You frowned. "Why do you say it like it's such a bad thing?"

"You're not going to like it."

You raised an eyebrow. "Go on."

"Deadman took BB away for maintenance. He said something about it becoming too much like an actual kid. And before you ask -no, it's not a good thing. BRIDGES needs Bridge Babies to function as a tool, otherwise it'll have to be terminated.

"This means I won't have my BB for some time. The only way to get it back faster is to increase the chiral density of the area. Only then will Deadman have the tools necessary to finish fixing BB."

"But how are you going to increase the chiral density out here?"

"By reconnecting preppers to the chiral network. The faster I get that done, the sooner I'll have BB again. The issue is that I won't have the means to spot BTs when I'm out on the field. I could risk going it alone but I could also partner up with someone who can see them." He looked straight at you.

"No." You shook your head adamantly. "No. I can't Sam. It's too risky-"

Sam leaned forward, a pleading look flashed through his eyes. "Y/N, listen. Amelie told me Higgs and his men have taken over Edge Knot City. I'm running out of time to save her. If I don't get connect these preppers and get BB back as soon as possible, she'll be done for. You're the only one I can count on."

A deep crease formed between your brows. You knew Sam wouldn't ask for your help unless he was desperate for it. It would break your heart to deny him. But at the same time, you couldn't shake the fear that this would make it so much easier for Higgs to find you.

Sam exhaled a deep, defeated breath. "Nevermind, I knew it wasn't fair to ask-"

"I'll help," you blurted out. "But only because if something happened to you out there, I would never forgive myself."

Sam looked at you dead in the eyes. "Thank you Y/N. I'll watch your back, got it? No matter what, I won't let Higgs get to you."

You broke the eye contact first and stared at your hands. "I guess we better get started then."

—

Within the next few days, you and Sam managed to put the Doctor, Mountaineer, and Spiritualist back on the grid.

It had been an exhausting and terrifying effort, especially with the threatening presence of Higgs looming in your mind. On the brighter side, you got a call from Deadman telling you BB was nearly fixed. All you needed were two more stops before Sam could have it again. 

Next on the list was the Photographer. 

You and Sam wasted no time delivering her requested cargo and were already preparing to reconnect her to the UCA when her hologram lingered at the terminal.

"I have a favour to ask of you," she began.

You and Sam shared a look.

It turned out she wanted you to retrieve her late father's camera. She lost it out on the field, but hadn't found the courage to go looking for it again.

"But it's still got the cargo tag on it," the Photographer said, "I figured with you guys being BRIDGES members and all, you might be able to pinpoint its location."

You swallowed dry. There were only two possible places the camera could've ended up: destroyed in a ditch or in the middle of a MULE camp. 

Your stomach lurched. 

When her hologram disappeared, you quickly checked your cufflink, scanning for the cargo tag. Thanks to BRIDGES technology, the camera was easily located.

Your blood ran cold.

It was as you feared: MULEs had taken hold of the camera.

"You want to do this one with me?" Sam asked, referring to your screen. He'd figured it out, too.

You shook your head. "I don't think I can go back. Not yet," you said, "If I go, I'll only jeopardise the mission." You were unable to look Sam in the eyes, riddled with shame and guilt. "It's not a cop out, I swear. It's a safety measure..." Your voice faltered, embarrassed.

"Y/N," Sam said. The gentleness and understanding in his voice caught you by surprise. "It's OK, I can manage this one alone. Besides, there won't be any BTs around. MULES never camp in their territory."

You looked up at him finally. "Are you sure?" 

Sam moved as if to touch your arm, but stopped short, suddenly aware of what he was doing. He put his hand down and cleared his throat. "Um. Yeah, yeah. I'm sure. I should head out. The MULE camp's not too far from here."

You nodded. "Call me if you need backup, alright?"

"I will."

Then he left.

An hour passed.

Sam never called.

You grew worried, pacing anxiously around the room. Had something happened to him? Had Higgs finally made an appearance? You wanted to slap yourself for letting your fear of MULES put Sam in danger-

You heard the distinct crunch of boots approaching and you stopped dead in your tracks.

At last, Sam had arrived, stolen cargo strapped to his back. He looked disgruntled.

"What happened?" You asked, equal parts relieved and concerned, as he delivered the camera.

"My power skeleton ran out of juice on the way back," he groaned, "Carrying so much deadweight uphill makes for a really bad fucking time."

"Sam, you could've called me, I'd have zip-lined you a PCC to build a generator."

Sam shook his head. "No, I didn't want to risk calling attention to myself. Hey. Don't give me that look."

"What look?"

"That puppy-eyed look. I'm getting such a guilty conscience for making you worry." 

You cracked a smile in spite of yourself. "Well, if anyone deserves a guilty conscience, it's me. I'm the one who made you go alone."

"I guess this makes us even," Sam smiled back. He gestured to your power skeleton. "Does yours need recharging?"

"Nah. Mine's ready to go."

"Good. I'll charge mine for a bit and we can head off to the last stop. The.. Roboticist," Sam squinted as he read the orders on his cufflink. "He's up in the mountains."

"That means BT territory, doesn't it?" You asked, feeling the dread pool at the pit of your stomach.

"Yeah. That means you'll be in charge out there, Y/N."

"I won't let you down," you said.

It didn't take long after the Photographer joined the UCA for you to find yourself waddling knee-deep in snow.

"I always thought I would love hiking in the mountains, but I swear to God, I don't ever want to be near them again," you huffed, struggling to catch your breath, "Where is this guy stationed again?"

"A little more southeast," Sam said, also out of breath. 

"Man, why are they always so far away from one another," you muttered.

You and Sam trekked through the mountain for a while. The hardest part of it all wasn't the cold or the physical exertion of pushing through the snow. It was the fear of slipping. A few times you and Sam fell, but managed to right yourselves just before gravity sent you sliding down the whole mountain.

Thankfully, the steep inclines eventually levelled out into even terrain, but your relief only lasted a split second. 

You noticed lost cargo scattered everywhere in different states of decomposition and ruin. It looked like the remains of some battlefield.

Sam shot you a suspicious look. He let you lead the way through the area as the sky darkened and the air temperature dropped even further. Your breath formed a white cloud every time you exhaled.

You stopped and looked around.

"BTs," Sam said quietly behind you. "I can feel them."

You nodded. "Me too, but I can't see them yet. Stay close Sam."

You proceeded quietly in the dark, shivering and listening intently to the whispers of the wind and your ragged breath. Your eyes darted everywhere, suspicious of every movement and shadow.

Suddenly, you raised a hand, signalling to stop.

The first BT was a few meters in front of you, unaware of you and Sam.

You felt a pang of sadness deep in your chest at the sight of it. Even though they were the reason the world was so miserable, you couldn't help but pity this lonely soul, stranded forever in limbo.

Slowly, you grabbed the anti-BT handgun and aimed carefully. You pulled the trigger and with a wail, the BT was gone.

"Did you get it?" Sam whispered.

"Yeah," you said, turning to him. Your eyes went wide.

There was another BT not far behind Sam and it was making its way closer to you. 

Calmly, you signalled for Sam to cover his mouth as the BT gained on you. Holding your own breath, you carefully prepared another shot.

Handprints appeared in the distance and Sam instinctively grabbed a grenade. 

You held up your hand. Wait. 

He nodded.

You pointed the gun at the BT, closing one eye to aim. Your hands were shaking from the cold.

You shot but missed. You cursed, frustrated, under your breath.

The BT shrieked. It was approaching. Fast.

You were faster.

Quickly reloading your gun, you aimed at its head.

One pull of a trigger and it vanished, leaving only a trail of red smoke in its wake. 

Sam gasped for air. "That was close."

"Too close," you said, breathing heavily, scanning the area in case more BTs showed up, but you couldn't see them. We're good to go."

After a long while of carefully and laboriously pushing through the treacherous mountain, the snow gave way to a grassier, rockier terrain. 

There would definitely be no more BTs from here on out. 

The only issue now was the weather. Normally it cleared up when one made it out of BT territory, but the sky had remained overcast ever since your encounter with them in the mountain. 

Confused, you checked back on Sam. Maybe he'd have some ideas about this.

His hood was down despite the threat of rain. Sam's ponytail had come undone and now his hair covered his face and eyes. It was a rough look, but it made him all the more handsome.

You blushed.

"What?" he asked, pulling his hair up with an extra hair tie.

The heat on your cheeks grew warmer. "Nothing."

"Check it out," Sam gestured forward with his chin as his hood automatically covered his head again. "I spy with my little eyes the Roboticist."

Connecting the Roboticist to the UCA took no time at all. He had no extra favours to ask, and no extra deliveries to be made on his behalf. He was ready to be a part of the UCA and Sam was more than happy to oblige.

After all, this meant Sam would finally get his BB back.

When your business with the Roboticist was concluded, you awaited eagerly for Deadman's update . 

Within minutes, the man's hologram appeared at the terminal. He looked happy.

"BB-28 is in excellent condition," Deadman said, "No evidence of lingering attachments or homesickness either. Perhaps its memory was erased after all."

Hang on. Memories erased? This was news to you. You looked at Sam, but his expression was virtually indecipherable.

"When can I get BB?" he asked.

There was some reluctance in Deadman's voice. "I was hoping to return BB to you as soon as possible but... I don't want to. I mean, I do, but it's a little more complicated than that."

"What?" Sam snapped.

Deadman carefully explained the supercell headed for Mountain Knot City. That explained the weather outside the Roboticist's station.

"I'm unable to make it back to the City," Deadman confessed. "You know the cabin on the mountain side -northeast of Mountain Knot? Let's meet there."

Sam was exhausted, and there was no denying you were as well, but you weren't going to give up now. And neither was Sam.

"Come on," he said, "BB's waiting."

By the time you reached the cabin, the weather had taken a turn for the worst. The wind was so strong you could barely see more than steps in front of you. If it hadn't been for your Odradek scanning for Sam, you would've lost him in the blizzard.

"Y/N! Keep up!" Sam yelled, voice carried by the wind.

You tried your best to do that, but your legs were burning and your lungs felt like they were going to burst.

Luckily the cabin wasn't far ahead. You could hear Deadman yelling something at you and Sam.

The wind grew stronger, howling at you fiercely. It ripped you up off the ground and towards the cabin with its sheer strength.

You panicked and screamed out for Sam.

"Y/N!" Sam cried out, trying to jump and catch you.

It was too late. 

Your world went dark.


	7. Chapter 7

You awoke to the sound of gunshots in the distance.

Blinking to clear your vision, you pushed yourself up from the hard cobblestone, resting on your knees. The strong smell of blood and dirt overwhelmed you, compelling the cogs and wheels of your mind to turn. It appeared you were in a war-torn town, abandoned by all civilian life.

A jet, engines spewing smoke, flew overhead and crashed somewhere behind a decrepit building in the distance.

Filled with a mixture of awe and horror, you stood. "What the-"

The sound of boots marching forced your attention behind you. You spun to see a large tank, flanked by soldiers, heading your way.

Without hesitation, you ducked for cover behind the nearest barbed wire barricade, waiting with bated breath as they walked past, apparently unaware of you. At the risk of revealing yourself, you took a peak over the barricade to get a closer look at the men. 

You covered your mouth, holding back a terrified gasp. 

The soldiers were skeletons, eyes glowing red.

You crouched behind the barricade again, confused and afraid. Were these soldiers BTs? Ghosts?

A ringtone suddenly blared from your cufflinks, making you jump.

It was Deadman.

"D-deadman, are you alright? Where is this place?" you whispered harshly.

"I'll explain everything later, Y/N. Right now, I need you to find Sam. He's got BB from me, but he could be in trouble."

"What do you mean?" 

"That soldier -the one who tried to take Sam's BB- is here. I need you to make sure Sam's OK. I would do it myself, but as it stands, I have no weapons and would only get in the way. I thought you might be more prepared."

"Why me?" you snapped back.

"Sam said that defeating that soldier was our ticket back home. The sooner he does that, the faster we get out of here. If he has your help-" Deadman's voice was interrupted by the sounds of an explosion. "-I hope you understand." 

You swallowed dry. "Do you know where he is?" you said, yielding to Deadman's request.

"Sam left just before I called you, so I'm guessing he must still be in the area. I'm in the sewers by a bell tower."

You looked around and spotted the tower in question. It was only a small distance away. "I see it," you said. Dread lurched in your stomach. "I'm on my way."

"Thank you Y/N. And please be careful," Deadman said before ending the call.

You proceeded towards the bell tower, careful to stay out of sight and line of fire. You hid behind barricades and buildings, progressing through the town until you were forced to a complete standstill before the town square. 

The bell tower was just on the other side of the square, but a large group of undead soldiers scattered throughout the area made you reconsider sneaking past. There weren't enough barricades, which made the risk of getting shot much too high. 

You crouched down, conserving your energy, as you tried to think how you'd get around this battlefield. You observed the soldiers when something unusual caught your attention. From what you've gathered, the soldiers in this world were always shooting at each other. These soldiers, however, were all shooting at the same thing.

From your standpoint couldn't make out what it was, but it didn't take long to piece everything together. 

As if on cue, Sam's distinct yell resounded over the gunshots.

All the hairs on your arm stood on end.

Deadman was right. Sam was definitely in trouble, and gravely outnumbered. 

You watched him run like hell to a barricade far away from the soldiers. He skidded and ducked for cover, hands trembling to reload his rifle as the enemies approached his hiding place.

They were closing in on him, and Sam hadn't reloaded properly yet. They raised their rifles, ready to attack, when another soldier suddenly jumped into view. The undead soldiers came to a halt, as if awaiting orders.

He wasn't skeletal like the others. No -he still looked human, with fiery dark cables coming out of a pack near his stomach, like charred umbilical chords. His rifle was at the ready and pointed directly in Sam's direction.

You gasped. He was the man who was trying to hunt down BB, and the soldiers were his personal army of the undead. 

He motioned his men forward and you were struck with the realisation that you had to help Sam. Fast. 

Shaking with nerves, you reached for two hematic grenades. If you could at least create enough diversion for Sam, he'd have enough time to deal some damage -or at least get the hell out of there.

You pulled the pin and threw one as hard as you could, then the next. The grenades flew in an arch through the air, bouncing against the cobblestone before landing some feet away from the soldiers. 

They noticed the surprise attack too late. In a second, the grenades exploded, spraying clouds of blood everywhere. Chaos ensued. Gunshots and shouting sounded from all over the place. Even more explosives went off. As hard as you tried, you couldn't see what was happening beyond the red mist.

"Retreat!" You heard someone yell above the noise. 

The battlecries came to an abrupt end, leaving the town square desolated and immersed in an eerie silence. Clenching your fists, you anxiously waited for the mist to fade, praying you hadn't accidentally killed Sam in your attempt to help him.

Soon you noticed the distinct yellow glow of BB's pod, but thanks to the lingering mist, it was hard to pinpoint who was carrying it. Had the soldier succeeded in stealing back BB? To your relief, the mist evaporated entirely. The enemy forces were gone, and it was Sam who remained all alone. 

He looked worse for wear, clothes wet with blood -though you didn't want to guess whom it belonged to. He looked deeply suspicious, clearly wondering where the grenades had come from. His rifle was ready in anticipation for any surprise attacks the undead soldiers might throw at him.

When he spotted you in the distance, he lowered his gun and immediately ran over to you. 

The closer he came, the more you could see the unhappiness stamped on his face.

"Are you alright?" you asked when Sam reached you.

He ignored your question. "What are you doing here?"

The aggression in his voice caught you off guard. "I got caught in the storm, remember?"

"Not that. I mean _this place_. It's dangerous out here." Sam's eyes darted around, searching the square. "Bastard could show up again at any minute."

"I've got weapons. I can help you," you urged. 

Sam shook his head stubbornly. "You haven't dealt with something like this before, Y/N. This isn't BT territory. This shit is different. Go wait with Deadman, he's-"

You scoffed. "No, Sam. I don't want to wait with Deadman. I can help."

Sam grit his teeth. "Forget it Y/N. You need to go."

"Sam I-"

"Open fire!" A harsh voice echoed from somewhere within the bell tower. The man and his army had returned. Only now he had more soldiers, and they burst out of the building ruins, guns blazing.

You and Sam were forced to break apart. He ran behind barricades and you found cover nearby behind rubble. 

You watched as Sam fire his gun, taking down any skeletal soldiers who pointed their weapons at him. His mark was unsteady from nerves and exhaustion, but he fired at the targets with an unfaltering resolve, prepared to keep shooting until they were gone for good.

A bullet whizzed past your ear, calling your attention back to your own battle. It was too late to go to Deadman. You were part of the war now.

You tossed the rest of your grenades at the soldiers approaching you. As the grenades went off, taking down a few skeletons, you switched deftly to your rifle and opened fire. From the periphery of your vision, you caught glimpses the captain's fiery cables, lurking about the battlefield, waiting for his opportunity to attack.

You tried to get a clearer view of him, but a soldier had circled around the rubble and fired, bullet ricocheting off the cobblestone near your feet.

"Take that you asshole!" You fired back, hitting him in the chest, then the head. He screeched something awful and was gone.

No more soldiers left on your end, you turned to Sam.

He had managed to single off the man. They were shooting directly at each other, each from behind their own barricades.

You moved to help him, but your legs gave out suddenly, forcing you onto your hands and knees, head spinning.

Blood loss. The words flashed in your mind. Despairing, you let go of your weapon and checked for blood bags. There were no replacements left. You scanned the area. Maybe -just maybe- there could be something useful lying around the battlefield-

A boot connected to your back and sent you crashing to the ground, chin scraping the cobblestone.

You were spun over to face an undead soldier, the barrel of his handgun pointed straight between your eyes.

You panicked, trying to get a hold of your rifle, but the soldier kicked it far away. He aimed the gun, ready to shoot.

You shut your eyes tight, unable to contain the tears that streamed down your face.

This was it. This was the end of the line.

Last thing you remembered was reach for your rifle one last time.

When you came to, you were in a private room.

You sat upright in a frenzy, checking your face and body for signs of a gunshot wound. There were no injuries save for the scrape on your chin, already starting to scab. Perplexed, you checked your cufflink and discovered only a day had passed since you were carried away by the supercell.

Did this mean Sam had taken down the man in the battlefield? Was Deadman back too?

With so many pressing thoughts in your head, you checked your cufflink for Sam's room number, you left in a hurry to find him.

When you arrived, you held your hand up to knock at the door, but voices from within the room made you stop short. It sounded like Sam and Deadman were in a middle of a conversation. Although you didn't want to eavesdrop, for some reason you couldn't help but press your ear to the door -just for a little bit.

"You must be caked in chiral matter from that battlefield," Deadman said, "Time for a shower, I'd say. Oh, I won't be joining you this time. The Die-Hardman issue is no longer a concern. I've seen to it that our conversations won't be recorded."

A crease formed between your brows. Why did Deadman say Die-Hardman wouldn't record their conversations? And what was that about taking showers together? Oh.

Pieces coming together, you took a step back, face burning and mouth wide with shock.

Sam and Deadman were... You shook your head. 

Stop, you thought, don't dwell on it. This is none of your business.

The conversation carried on inside the room, with no signs of coming to an end. Too embarrassed to interrupt them now, you decided it would be best to leave your questions for another time.

You spun back on your heels and walked straight back to your room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Guys I gotta call myself out here: can you believe I’ve been referring to cryptobiotes as ‘cryobites’ all this time. I legitimately played through the whole thinking that was their proper name, until I aw the words “cryptobiotes” printed clearly on the tv screen yesterday ahaha oh MAN, why don’t I ever pay attention to details. I have BDE (big dumbass energy)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Years Eve, my tumblr fam! I’ve got a bit of a cold, so no fancy partying for me tonight (Who am I kidding tho, when do I ever party. People don’t call me grandma for no reason, hahaha). Hope you celebrate the end of year with a bang, in whichever way applies to you!

Sam leaned against your doorframe casually, his arms crossed. "So, wanna go with me?" he asked.

"Go where exactly?" you said, staring at the new cryptobiote jar BRIDGES had provided for you. You thought offhandedly of Crypto and Biote back at Port Knot City. Hopefully they hadn't died in your absence.

"Heartman wants me to connect his lab to the chiral network. I heard his place looked fancy and figured it might be fun for you to come see it with me," Sam said.

You gave Sam a long look. It'd only been a few minutes since he came knocking at your door, calling your name. It was unusual for him to be so frantic, you could only assume Mountain Knot City was under some sort of attack. After you let him in, however, it didn't take long to discover he was just excited to ask for your company.

"You do realise me wandering around United States with you was a one time thing," you said, "Higgs is still technically out there."

The words didn't faze Sam. "Think about it, Y/N. He hasn't shown his face in a while. For all we know, he's completely forgotten about you. And besides, Heartman's lab isn't far from here. It's up the mountains-"

"Ugh. More mountains," you groaned, "You really want me to come with you that badly?"

"This is the last time I'll ask." Sam held up his pinky. "I promise."

You considered his words for a moment. It was common knowledge that Die-Hardman planned to send Sam over the tar belt to Edge Knot City soon.

It dawned on you this could be your only chance to hang out him. Sam probably knew this, too. It was no wonder he was so eager to see you.

You let out a sigh of defeat. "Well now I have say yes, don't I? You've gotten me all invested in this Heartman guy and his lab."

Sam cracked a smile. "Then I'll see you at the terminal?"

"Yes, sir. Now go upstairs so I can get ready." You shooed him playfully out of your room.

—

"Never thought I'd get to see a heart-shaped lake before," you marvelled, holding tightly onto the rope as you completed your slippery descent to the snowy valley.

Sam, who'd already made it to the bottom, tugged at his straps, making sure Mama's corpse stayed secure behind him.

Heartman's requested cargo had included Mama's body and the tags of the soldier Sam encountered in that battlefield. While the tags were safely stowed away in Sam's pocket, Mama's corpse kept swinging side-to-side, often causing Sam to lose his balance.

It made you increasingly worried both for Sam and for Mama's body.

"Need any help?" you asked for hundredth time, letting go of the rope when you reached level ground.

"Nope, I told you, I'm fine," Sam said, flashing you a reassuring smile, "We're almost there. See that facility on the other side of the lake? That's Heartman's lab."

You squinted. The lab was shrouded by the heavy, white snow, but you could still make out the silhouette in the distance. It made you gasp. All this time you'd expected a typical prepper-style station, but instead were faced with the largest private facility you'd seen to date.

It didn't take long for you to cross the lake and stand at the foot of the staircase that lead up to Heartman's lab. Sam disregarded the view and began the climb to the foyer, but you couldn't help but take a moment to appreciate the lab. The architecture of it all looked so expensive, it was breathtaking. You'd never seen a structure so _stylish_.

"Told you it was fancy," Sam called out, watching from a few steps above you. "Come on, Mama's starting to get really heavy."

At the top of the stairs, the glass doors opened automatically to the finest and warmest foyer you'd ever walked into. Most of the walls consisted of clear glass panels, offering you a complete view of the snowy landscape outside. You could even make out the exact path in the mountains you and Sam made to get here.

The sound of the terminal rising from the ground called your attention back to the foyer. There was only one wall that wasn't made of glass. Instead, it was a brick wall with a large fireplace installed right in the middle of it. The fire radiated a constant, delicious heat throughout the whole room.

While Sam connected Heartman's lab to the UCA, you stood near the fireplace and even took off your gloves to hold your palms over the flames. The warmth made you sigh in happiness.

"I could toast a marshmallow over this fire," you said.

"Never had a marshmallow," Sam mumbled.

" _Please proceed into the facility with the cadaver_ ," the voice in the terminal announced.

The entrance to Heartman's lab was down a hall that was lined with paintings on one side and skulls inside glass casings on the other. It looked much like what you expected of a museum exhibition, but you didn't spend much time studying them. Sam was in a hurry.

You waited in front of the lab's metal doors, which after a second slid open to reveal a room doused in pink and blue lights.

You gestured for Sam to step in first. He had the requested cargo after all.

When it was your turn to enter, however, a red light flashed in warning.

" _Unauthorised visitor. Please exit the lab_."

Sam looked distraught. "No, she's with me," he snapped back at the system, as if it would make a difference to your predicament.

" _Unauthorised visitor. Please exit the lab_." The words blared again overhead.

You hurriedly stepped back into the hallway, successfully cutting off the alarm system. "Looks like Heartman wasn't expecting me," you laughed, trying to mask the embarrassment and disappointment. "Don't look so sad. I'm sure all you're going to do is discuss boring business anyway-"

Before you could finish, the door to Heartman's labs closed, sealing you outside until further notice.

You stood alone in the hallway, not sure what to do. You'd been looking forward to getting to know Heartman's lab, so now what? The disappointment grew worse and you took a deep breath. Don't let this ruin your day, you told yourself.

Plenty of time to kill, you took your time to study the skulls and the paintings in the hall. They were all pertaining to the Beach or BTs in their own unique way.

It was fascinating at first, but didn't take long for that to turn into boredom.

You returned to the foyer and took a seat by the fire, opting to take a seat on the floor. Without much else to pay attention to, you focused on how the flames crackled overhead, or how the snowflakes floated gently in the wind.

In the warm, relaxing silence, your eyelids and body grew heavy. The sounds and sights were lulling you to the edge of sleep. Your head began to drop...

"Y/N," Sam called your name.

Your eyelids fluttered open. "Wha-"

He looked amused. "You alright?"

"Yeah. Um. Was I asleep?" You wiped a little bit of drool that had dribbled down the corner of your mouth.

Sam let out a snort. "Yeah. You were snoring."

Your face burned a deep red. "God, that's so inappropriate," you mumbled, using the wall to help yourself back on your feet.

"I won't tell anyone." Sam smirked. "Hey, by the way, I told Heartman about you. He said he was deeply sorry his security system didn't let you through, and wanted to make up for it. I think you're gonna like this."

"Really?" You asked, curiosity spiking. "What is it?"

A knowing smile grew on Sam's face. "You're going to have to wait and see."

Sam took you outside and up a set of stairs to the level above the foyer.

You gasped excitedly at the sight of a spa, complete with a view to the mountain range. 

"I haven't taken a bath like this since the hot spring over at Lake Knot. This is so beautiful," you said, "And look at that painting!" You pointed to the large artwork featured on the wall next to the spa. It depicted a sunny ocean and a snow-capped mountain in the distance.

"Heartman said you can stay for as long as you want," Sam said, "Go on ahead. I'll wait downstairs."

"You're not going in, too?" The words slipped out of your mouth before you could stop yourself.

Sam instantly blushed. "Er- I mean, -"

You blushed, too. "It's OK if you don't want to-"

"No, I do."

His change in demeanour caught you off guard. 

"Come on, it's not getting any warmer out here," Sam said, "Ladies first." 

Sam turned his back to give you some privacy and the deja-vu hit you like a ton of bricks. 

It was reminiscent of the day Sam walked in on you taking a bath at the natural hot springs.

You smiled, keeping the observation to yourself, as you undressed and stepped into the water. Shivers travelled up your spine as your skin made contact with the heat. 

"How's the temperature?" Sam asked. 

"So good. I'm going to have to thank Heartman later for his generosity." You submerged yourself neck-deep into the water and turned away from Sam. "Ok, you can come in now. I'm not looking."

The sound of him fumbling around with his equipment and clothes unwittingly made your heart race. Slow down there, you reminded yourself. He's with Deadman. There's no reason to be nervous.

Still, when Sam let out a hiss as he entered the water, your heart-rate spiked. 

"It's so hot," he said.

"Can I turn around?" 

"Yeah, sure."

You spun around to find Sam pouring some water from his cupped hand onto the rope burns on his shoulder. 

Inadvertently, you took notice of how his entire torso was covered in handprints. You'd seen them on his arms before, but never realised they were everywhere on his body. 

You opened your mouth to comment on it when something bumped your side -it was BB swimming in its pod. It cooed happily at you.

"Hey there BB, I didn't realise you could swim, too. You are full of surprises." You smiled and tapped the glass playfully. 

BB smiled and formed a heart-shaped bubble.

"Looks like Lou's taken to you," Sam noted.

You raised an eyebrow. "Lou?" 

"That's its name. Deadman warned me about not getting attached, but I'm a goner." Sam waded through the water towards you.

"You two seem close," you mentioned offhandedly.

Sam looked at you with a curious expression. "Are you referring to me and BB? Or Deadman?"

"Deadman. You're always together and-" you bit back your words. Should you tell Sam what you'd heard? Should you expose his private life?

"And?" Sam persisted.

"Well, um... The day after we came back from that war zone, I went to your place to check on you. But when I got to the door I accidentally overheard the conversation between you and Deadman. He said you two were showering together."

Sam's expression darkened. "What else did you hear?" 

You rubbed your hands together, feeling awful. "Something regarding Die-Hardman, but I can't recall exactly what. That's it, though. I'm so sorry, I really didn't mean to eavesdrop, Sam. It was wrong of me." 

Sam let out a long breath. "It's fine, Y/N. Don't beat yourself up. There wasn't any harm done." 

"Aren't you pissed?" 

Sam flicked some water on you. "Nah, you said it was an accident, so I trust you. Besides, this is BRIDGES we're talking about. Can't expect much privacy in those rooms." 

You relaxed your shoulders. "In any case, I'm sorry I found out about you and Deadman when it was none of my business. If it means anything, I'm happy for you. He seems like he's a very caring partner." 

Sam looked nonplussed. "We're not a couple, Y/N." 

You made a face. "But how do you explain the whole business of showering together? That's not a very platonic activity-" As the words left your mouth, you became painfully aware of how you and Sam were naked in a spa together. You were mortified, but to your relief, Sam didn't seem to draw the same conclusion. 

"Look, I understand why you would've made that assumption, but I promise you, it's not what it seems." Sam sighed. "It's hard to explain right now, but I promise I'll clear everything up later." Unexpectedly, he pointed at his cufflink, then to his ears, and shook his head. He mouthed 'BRIDGES'.

You frowned. BRIDGES couldn't hear this? Is that what Sam was trying to say? It was all very confusing, but you had no choice except to take his word for it. 

"Don't get all worried. It's nothing bad," Sam said. Again, he flicked some water on you.

You cracked a smile and flicked some water in retaliation before you sat agains the edge of the spa.

Sam came to sit next to you. He was so close your arms almost touched.

It was one thing for Sam to correct you about your assumptions of him and Deadman. But then to make a point to sit next to you, in spite of his phobia, it almost seemed like he was trying to hint at something. Blood rushed to your face. Wait, were you being too presumptuous? What if the gesture had no real meaning? What if Sam was simply trying to get over his aphenphosmphobia?

Overwhelmed with your thoughts, you focused on Lou trying to swim in a circle instead.

"This is going to sound really morbid," Sam said, "But I'm thankful you had that motorbike accident. Otherwise, I wouldn't have met you."

You let out a laugh in spite of yourself. "Jeez, that does sound really morbid." You turned to face Sam and caught him looking straight into your eyes.

For a split second his eyes darted down to your lips and back. You could've sworn he inched a little closer.

You inched closer too-

All of a sudden, his cufflink rang loudly.

It was Die-Hardman letting Sam know he needed to check the available orders at Heartman's terminal.

To your surprise, Die-Hardman called your name, too.

"Y/N, heard you went sight-seeing with Sam," he said, "Unfortunately, I'm going to need you to come back to Mountain Knot. The city's in need of more skilled porters."

"Damn," Sam muttered after Die-Hardman ended the call. "I was just about to ask if you wanted to come deliver Heartman's cargo with me."

"It's too bad, really." You smiled. "I would've said yes."


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was tough… tough to plan, tough to execute, tough to stomach. I hope you guys enjoy all the same haha
> 
> And on a lighter note, happy birthday to Norman Reedus! It's thanks to him (and, ofc, Kojima) that this fic is possible!!

You awoke to the sound of BRIDGES' anthem playing in the intercom.

You groaned, annoyed, as you half-heartedly covered your ears with a pillow. 

Die-Hardman's voice sounded from the speakers: "Today, one of our esteemed BRIDGES member will repair the Chiral Relay. From there, he will travel to Edge Knot City and help bring Amelie back to Capital Knot City. With her imminent return, we will be able to fully restore the UCA."

Die-Hardman's words registered slowly in your half-asleep brain. 

_Chiral Relay... Restore the UCA..._

You sat up, wide-awake. 

Sam was leaving today. 

You jumped out of your bed, racing to put on some proper clothes.

You had to say goodbye. He was going to be away for such a long time, who knew when you'd ever get to see him again-

The sudden sound of a knock startled you. Curious, you pulled up your jeans and opened the door to find Sam waiting on the other side. He was dressed in full BRIDGES gear, looking more than ready for Amelie's rescue mission sister. 

"Morning sunshine," he said, "Going somewhere?" 

"I- I was actually on my way to see you," you stammered, trying to collect your thoughts and calm down from the shock. "I thought you were going to leave." 

Sam made a face. "Without saying goodbye to you? Come on," he scoffed playfully, "Besides, I've got one last delivery to make before I go." He reached into his backpack and pulled out a small glass jar. "This is for you." 

You gasped. "No way. Is this-"

"Your little guys, Crypto and Biote. I used Fragile's umbrella to jump to Port Knot City to get them. You've done so much for me, I figured the least I could do was bring them over."

You cradled the jar in your hands. "Sam, I don't know what to say. This is the nicest thing someone's ever done for me." You looked at him, in earnest, "You have no idea how much I want to hug you right now." 

"I know," he smiled. 

His cufflink rang loudly and it wiped the smile right off his face. 

"I uh- gotta go," he grimaced.

Dread pooled at the pit of your stomach. Tears threatened to spill but you kept them under control. The last thing you wanted was for Sam to see you cry.

"Then this is goodbye," you said, forcing a tight smile. "Good luck out there. And tell Amelie I said hi when you find her."

Sam smiled, but the gesture didn't reach his eyes. "Thanks, Y/N. Stay safe, alright?"

"I promise," you said, clenching your jaw, trying not to get choked up. 

Sam looked over his shoulder at you one last time.

Then he was gone. 

—

You stood by the terminal, baffled, as you re-read an order shining brightly on the screen above.

A certain Peter Englert had specifically assigned you -of all porters- to urgently deliver a pizza to his station west of Lake Knot City. 

You pursed your lips.

Normally, all deliveries were assigned at random to discourage favouritism amongst porters. While you definitely didn't want to be seen as being given preferential treatment, the client had promised a good rating, amongst other rewards. As much as you felt some embarrassment to have been handpicked, it was hard to ignore the benefits of the job. 

In the end, you accepted the delivery, secured the pizza flat on your bike, and soon, was underway to Peter's station.

The pizza smelled amazing behind you, making your stomach growl. Hopefully one day you'd be able to get a pizza for yourself. Maybe even share it with Sam.

Sam...

Yesterday morning, Sam had left for the tar belt. According to Die-Hardman in this morning's update, he had already fixed the Chiral Relay and was set to cross the tar belt. 

You gripped the handle of your motorbike. His next stop was Edge Knot City. Anxiously, you wondered if everything was alright with him. 

The bike lurched as it ran over a pile of jagged rocks, nearly throwing you off balance and forcing your attention back to the present moment. You looked around. The terrain had become too rough to continue by bike. Deciding it would be safer for your delicate cargo, you opted to continue the rest of the journey on foot.

You reached your destination within a few minutes and made the delivery at the terminal to the sound of your growling stomach. In a moment, your ratings flashed on the screen. You smiled, having been given an S for the "awesome timing and condition of the cargo". 

Now all that was left were those "other rewards" that Peter had promised.

You waited by the conveyor belt.

And waited.

They never arrived.

Instead, the door to the station opened and someone stepped into the foyer.

Your world came crashing down. Covering your mouth in horror and confusion, you staggered backwards. "No. It can't be-"

"Surprise! Weren't expecting me, were you? Made the name up myself." Higgs laughed. "And might I add, you guys deliver some good pizza. I would even offer you a slice but unfortunately, Y/N, you don't deserve it." He jumped closer to you, his face only a mere inches away from yours. "You've been a really naughty girl." 

One look at his expression and everything clicked. The order assignment, the timing of it all -this was a trap. Higgs had found out what you did, and now that Sam was gone, you were going to pay. 

You tried to run but Higgs grabbed your arm, twisting it painfully behind your back. "No, no. You're not going anywhere." Higgs took a deep breath of your scent. "Did you really think I wasn't going to find out? About the deliveries? Your little date at that scientist's spa?" he murmured into your ear, "I must admit, it's my fault I let you get away with this for so long. You see, watching you two believe you had any sort of control was too fucking fun." With his free hand, he caressed your cheek, and hand travelled down your neck and chest...

You felt hot tears prick the corners of your eyes. "No," you whispered shakily under your breath, urging yourself not to cry. A whimper unwittingly escaped your lips when he ventured a little too low beneath your stomach. "Stop." 

"What if I don't want to?" Higgs whispered. Then he chuckled and, to your relief, removed his hand. "Nah, I don't have time to play around. I need to have a chit-chat with Sam, and you need to become BT food, remember?" Higgs' stood straighter, as if struck with an idea. "Tell you what, Y/N, let's go visit Sam together. I get to have my chit-chat, and you get to say one last goodbye. How does that sound?"

Before you could answer, you vision went dark. When you blinked, you were somewhere outdoors. A cool breeze triggered goosebumps all across your skin. As the chiral allergy-induced tears slid down your cheeks, you noticed the borders of a vast city in the distance -or what was left of it. Something wet lapped at your feet. It was tar.

You gasped, putting two and two together. This was Edge Knot City. Higgs had jumped all the way across the tar belt. 

The sound of gagging and retching caught your attention. You turned to find Sam on all fours, vomiting what seemed to be large quantities of the black tar. 

"Sam!" You cried out. You wanted to run to him, but Higgs still held onto you.

When Sam looked up, all of the colour drained from his face.

"Y/N." Instinctively, he moved towards you, but a pool of tar sprang from underneath him. BTs shot out of the liquid, grabbing hold of his arms and legs, keeping him in place.

"Ah-ah, Sammy boy, I wouldn't do that if I were you," Higgs said, wagging his finger at Sam. "I need you to stay right there and watch, OK?"

"Fuck you," Sam spat. "Let her go!" 

"Oh I fully intend to," Higgs said, and running his thumb across your lips. "But not the way you expect." Higgs pushed you away and grabbed his gun, pointing it straight at you.

Images of that undead soldier pointing his gun at you flashed through your mind. It was like deja-vu. The only difference was that there was no escaping this time. 

Your heart skipped a beat and you fought hard to keep the tears from spilling, but when Higgs loaded his gun, you couldn't help the sob that escaped your lips.

"I told you, dear Y/N, you're BT food," he said with a smirk and took the shot.

For a second, the world fell silent. All you could hear was the sound of your own ragged breathing.

And then you felt pain.

You screamed in agony, falling to your knees. The open wound on your thigh pumped blood and burned -burned so much, as if someone had pouring molten lava onto your nerves and muscles. 

"Oops. I missed," Higgs chuckled.

Sam struggled against the BTs, yelling obscenities at the top of his lungs.

Higgs ignored him and walked closer to you. "I promise I won't miss this time," he said as he loaded the gun for another shot. He aimed between your eyes, but paused. "On a second thought, I don't want you to cause a voidout just yet. I still need to talk with Sam." He lowered the gun towards your torso. "Let's have you bleed out instead. That way we'll all get spared a couple more minutes. Isn't that better?"

Higgs words flew right past you. You couldn't move, you couldn't think. You could barely breath. All of you could feel was the searing pain in your leg, and so much fear.

"Sam," you croaked out, helplessly reaching out for him, who was trying so hard to get to you. "I don't want to die."

Higgs smirked and took the shot.


	10. Chapter 10

You heard the faint crashing of waves. With every breath, the sound grew louder, and your senses sharper: the smell of the sea, the softness of sand, warmth of the sun on your body.

Your eyes fluttered open to view of a clear blue sky. With some effort, you sat up to face a calm ocean.

A strange ache called your attention to your abdomen. There was a fresh cross-shaped scar on your skin, but no signs of stitches or blood. Curious, you traced it with your fingertips, and noticed your leg also had a similarly-shaped scar.

“Y/N," came a calm voice from behind you.

You turned to find a lady in a red dress. Breath catching on your lips, you already knew who she was. You'd seen her face in every poster, every holographic announcement. She was the reason for the UCA’s existence and Sam’s mission.

“Amelie,” you said, “Where am I?”

“The beach,” she replied with a saddened expression.

"But this means..." Panic pumped through your veins. “My body is... I’m going to cause a voidout. Sam's going to-" 

Amelie shook her head slowly, like a loving mother to a scared child. “There won’t be a voidout. I’ve made sure of it. No BTs will come to you and your body is safe from necrosis.” She looked over her shoulder, as if something had caught her attention. “I need to keep this brief. You don’t have much time left.”

You pushed yourself up to your feet, swaying a little before finding your balance. “What do you mean?”

"I can’t let you stay here Y/N,” Amelie said. She opened her mouth, then closed it. “I know this is very confusing. I wish I could explain everything, but Higgs will find me soon. I need to make sure he doesn’t find you, too." Amelie closed the gap between you and took your hands in hers, squeezing it reassuringly. She was surprisingly warm. 

"I -I don't understand, Amelie. Where am I going?" 

"Back to the world of the living." Amelie smiled softly. "Sam needs you, just as much as you need him. I can't bear to watch this delicate bond be torn apart -not one as rare and as strong as yours." She gently guided you over to the ocean until the two of you stood knee deep in the water.

You looked around you, questions running through your mind, “What’s happening?”

Amelie embraced you tightly. “Thank you for all you’ve done for Sam,” she said, “This is my gift for you in return. Now, take a deep breath, Y/N.”

You were pushed into the water, sinking deeper and deeper until everything turned pitch black-

You gasped for air. Immediately, your stomach lurched, forcing you to dry-heave a few times before you finally caught your breath. 

A hand rubbed your back. 

Wiping the spit off your mouth, you turned to see Deadman next to you, eyes lighting up with relief and happiness.

"Thank God you're finally awake," he said, "You've been out for two days." 

Something tugged at your arm and you caught sight of the IV drip connected to the crook of your elbow. You frowned, gathering your surroundings. This was a BRIDGES hospital room. "What happened?" 

"We found you unconscious by the Distribution Centre. Nobody knows how you wound up here. The chiral network’s expansion has rendered the entire network too unstable to use for jumps -even Fragile can’t handle it.”

You clutched your bedsheets. "Where am I, exactly?" 

"Capital Knot City." 

It didn't make any sense. Last you checked, Higgs was loading you up with bullets all the way in Edge Knot City -no. That's not right. You were at the Beach, remember? Higgs had killed you, and you'd gone to the Beach. 

Knowing there was only one way to really confirm this, you subtly reached under the bedsheets to feel for the scar on your leg. When your fingertips brushed the raised skin, your blood turned to ice. 

So it was true. Amelie was responsible for taking you back to Capital Knot City. You clenched your jaw, trying to keep your face neutral. The implications of this information hit you like a ton of bricks. If Amelie had brought you back from the Beach, this made a Repatriate. 

"Sam's also come back," Deadman said, forcing your attention back to the present moment. “He arrived yesterday.”

You sat upright on the bed with a rush of excitement and anxiety all mixed together. “Is he alright? I need to go see him-”

Deadman shook his head, expression grim. “That won't be possible. He's already left to stop Amelie." 

You were taken aback. “What? I thought he was supposed to rescue her."

Deadman rubbed his hands together nervously. He pulled a chair and took a seat next to your bed. “I don't have the clearance to tell you this." Deadman looked around the room, clicked a few buttons on his and your cufflink and nodded, satisfied. "We'll be off-record for the next eight minutes, so I have to be quick. I know how much Sam means to you, and I thought you should know: we have reason to believe Amelie is an Extinction Entity. She might be leading us into the Last Stranding, and Sam is the only one who can stop her.” 

You thought back to Amelie's smile, her warmth, how she saved your life. "I don't believe that," you said.

Deadman sighed. "I'm afraid evidence is too strong." He explained how the soldier on the battlefield -Cliff, Higgs, even the beaches, all linked back to Amelie. He spoke of Die-Hardman’s realisation that no one had ever met her in person. Most important of all, Deadman revealed Bridget could not have children due to uterine cancer. "No one's ever met Amelie in the real world, and yet she ushered everyone to complete the UCA. Why? So she could begin the Last Stranding."

Your mind struggled to wrap itself around the unexpected influx of information. "What about Sam? Is he safe out there? Is he coming back?" 

Deadman's expression was unreadable. "We will make sure he does, no matter what.” His cufflink turned back on and he stood. “Anyways, I’ll let you rest a little longer. Please notify the nurses if you need anything. Oh, and I'll keep you updated when I can.”

As Deadman exited the room, you traced the scar on your leg, frustrated with the knowledge there was nothing you could do but sit and wait for news about Sam.

—

Capital Knot City was only a short distance away now. You sighed in relief. 

The delivery to the Musician’s station had been much more taxing than you’d anticipated -but understandably so. It was your first day back on the field since you'd been dispatched from the hospital, and your overall stamina had reasonably decreased due to all the bedrest. 

Being out of shape for the job didn't bother you much, since you knew your usual levels of fitness would return to normal in no time. It did bother you, however, that your stay at the hospital had forced you to miss Die-Hardman's inauguration as the new president of the UCA.

According to Deadman's updates, Sam had come back to Capital Knot City, having succeeded in stopping Amelie. But as she would no longer be able to step up as the new leader of the nation, it was only natural Die-Hardman took over.

You fixed the straps tugging painfully on your shoulders, offhandedly thinking of how they were going to leave some nasty-rope burns. 

Capital Knot City was closer now. 

You kicked a pebble, then another, and your mind wandered to Sam. You hadn't had the chance to speak to him since his return to Capital Knot City. You'd been convalescing in your hospital room, and Sam had been -well, busy saving the world. You wondered where he was, now that it was all over. He never wanted anything to do with BRIDGES to begin with. Would he leave altogether? 

Upset at the thought, you kicked one more pebble, hard. As you tracked its trajectory, you noticed a solitary porter walking up a steep incline. Goosebumps rose all over your skin.

It wasn't hard to recognise the pony-tail, the way he leaned forward as he made his way uphill, the way his head dropped when he walked. After all, you two had spent so much time together. You knew his mannerisms like the back of your hand.

Suddenly, full of energy, you ran at full speed towards the porter.

“Sam!” you yelled out, “Sam!”

Sam turned around, a look of disbelief registered on his face.

He gasped when he saw you, and without a minutes hesitation, broke into a sprint in your direction.

Sam stopped at barely an arm's length from you, looking you up and down as if he were still uncertain you were real. His eyes were red, brimmed with tears. “Y/N,” he said weakly. His chin quivered, like he was using every ounce of his strength to keep it together. A small whimper escaped his lips and he couldn’t hold back any longer. His face crumpled as he pulled you into a tight embrace. “I thought I lost you,” he sobbed, shoulders shaking. 

Caught by surprise, you couldn't help the tears that blurred your own vision. You had waited for this moment for so long -not only to be reunited with Sam, but to be able to touch him. The happiness was overwhelming. You wrapped your arms around him. “I'm here now, and I'm not going anywhere," you sniffed, laughing.

After a while, Sam pulled back. A few strands of his hair had come undone, covering his eyes. You raised your hand to gently brush them aside and he never flinched. Instead, he grabbed your hand and held it in his, but there was a sadness that lingered in his gaze.

"What's wrong?" you asked.

“BRIDGES wants me to incinerate Lou," Sam confessed, quietly.

You gasped. “They what?” Your eyes shot down at BB, its pod offline.

Sam showed you. He tapped the screen to reveal BB, eyes closed. At first glance, it only looked like it was sleeping, but there were no signs of life. No subtle movements, bubbles, nothing.

You looked at Sam and he looked like he was fighting tears again -only this time, tears of grief. 

“Sorry,” he said, “It’s just…“ His voice faltered. "There's a risk of a voidout, but, I don't know. I think Lou still has a chance." He clenched his jaw.

“Do you want me to go with you?” you asked softly.

Sam looked at you. He still hadn’t let go of your hand and squeezed it. “Yeah,” he said with a strained voice.

You walked with Sam, hand-in-hand, mostly in silence, until the Incinerator came in to view.

When you crossed the threshold onto the facility's concrete flooring, Sam’s breath hitched.

"Hey, Y/N, would you mind waiting outside?" Sam said. His eyes were glued to the Incinerator's entrance.

"Not at all," you said, "I'll be right here if you need me." You touched your lips, then placed them on Lou's pod -a little goodbye kiss. "I'm going to miss you, Lou." 

With a heavy heart, you watched Sam disappear inside the facility, and took a seat on a rock near the entrance. After a few minutes you heard the familiar sound of beeping as Sam registered his delivery at the terminal. Cogs and wheels turned inside the factory. You hugged yourself, biting the insides of your cheeks not to cry when you heard the sound of fire burning and smoke billowing from the chimneys. 

Out of the blue, the sound of a child crying erupted above all else. Puzzled, you turned to see Sam emerge from the Incinerator with Lou -out of the pod and very much alive- cradled in his arms.

“Look, Amelie brought Lou back to me," Sam explained excitedly, showing you Amelie's quipu. "She's free now. Why do you look so upset?" 

"What have you done?" Part of you wanted to be happy for Sam because he saved Lou, but the larger part of you was mortified, and it showed. 

Sam looked annoyed. “I couldn't let Lou die, Y/N. You know that," he scoffed. 

"This is illegal, Sam. They'll track you-" 

"They won't," Sam snapped. He revealed his bare wrist. "My cufflink's gone. They'll never find me. I'm off-grid for good."

You staggered backwards, hurt and disappointed. "Off-grid, huh?" You sucked your teeth. "Jesus, Sam."

"What?"

"You were always on about leaving BRIDGES, but I never expected you would cut all ties with everyone."

"I'm not cutting ties with you," Sam said. "I need you."

You threw your hands in the air, exasperated. "Apparently not. After what you did, you made it pretty clear you don't need anyone!" 

Lou started to cry.

Sam muttered a curse under his breathe. He rocked Lou, but now that she was out of the pod, he didn't even know how to hold her properly. He cursed again, frustrated.

"Give her here," you said, "Let me try." 

"I thought you said you made babies cry worse." 

"Not with Lou," you muttered.

Sam relented and handed you Lou, who you cradled against your shoulder and tapped her back gently. You shushed her, again and again, bouncing her lightly until her cries stopped altogether. Lou nestled against your neck and you could feel her breath on your skin.

A moment of silence fell between you and Sam.

"Where do we go from here?" you said eventually, with a defeated sigh. "It's not like you can visit on the weekends," you scoffed in spite of yourself.

"I want you to come with me," Sam said firmly.

The declaration stunned you, breath stopping short at the back of your throat. "What did you say?"

Sam gazed at you. "Come with me, Y/N. Please," he said. "I wasn't lying when I said I need you. Besides, you're the only one who can get Lou to stop crying like that."

You raised an eyebrow. "You want me to tag along because I'm a good babysitter?" 

Sam shot you an unamused look. "That's not what I meant Y/N. I want you to come because you make me happy, Y/N. And I know I make you happy too, otherwise only a lunatic would've stuck around someone like me for this long."

This made you scoff, amused. 

"Now, I made my choice, and I will respect yours regardless of what it'll be. But I just want you to know that every day not spent with you will be miserable." 

You looked at Sam, feeling the weight of Lou -now fast asleep- in your arms. You inhaled and exhaled. "It's terrifying to be asked to leave everything behind, Sam. It's all I know," you confessed, "But it's also terrifying to choose routine over happiness. I'm coming with you, even if it turns out to be the worst decision I've ever made," you teased, elbowing him. 

Sam laughed, his expression brightening. There was a spark of joy in his eyes unlike anything you'd ever seen before. 

"It won't be," he said, "We're going to figure this out, the three of us."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: And thus concludes this epic tale of two lovers... ish! 
> 
> Yes, I'll admit, I couldn't figure out how to sneak in a kiss for the ending, but there's a good justification for that. See, in canon, by the end of the game Sam had only JUST learned how to tolerate hugs -of all things! So you can imagine how hard it was to picture him feeling naturally inclined to kiss Y/N by that stage. It would've been too much touching too fast for someone who has a phobia! I couldn't bring myself to warp his character to fit a fictional plot, I'm too faithful to his mannerisms haha O-O'' hope you understand 
> 
> I also hope you enjoyed this last CH! Took me a while to figure out how to finish this story, and while I'm personally happy with it, i'm crossing my fingers wishing you are, too.
> 
> Thank you guys so much for sticking with me for so long. I've never published something with so much love and support before. You guys mean the world. I'm bound to all of you in gratitude and everlasting love! 
> 
> I'm opening up the floor to any questions you might have regarding the story. Now that it's finished, I feel more comfortable discuss the plot in more depth (in case you desire to know something specific).
> 
> Thanks again guys! It's been such a joy to write for you!
> 
> Here's to more stories in 2020!


End file.
